Did You Have a "Church" Wedding?
There is a big difference between dating and marriage. Dating is like a test drive; the person is still kicking the tires and weighing their options. They are interested in what they see, but are not quite ready to make a purchase. Marriage, on the other hand, is a done deal. The decision has been made and the title transferred.
There were certain characteristics that existed when I was dating Jill which do not exist in our marriage. For instance, I sometimes let things comes between us (football, other people); I felt uncomfortable talking about her (parents, teasing friends); I did not feel responsible for her problems (braces, car repairs); I was not overly generous (dinner, but not a house); I took our relationship for granted (on again, off again); and I hid my weaknesses. Perhaps these same characteristics will help us to determine whether we are dating the church, or are married to it.
If you let things come between you and the church, you’re just dating. If you feel uncomfortable talking about the church, you’re just dating. If you do not feel responsible to help the church with its problems, you’re just dating. If you are not overly generous to the church, you’re just dating. If you take your relationship with the church for granted, you’re just dating. If you hide your weaknesses from the church, you're just dating.
Research has shown that churches are suffering from a “commitment crisis.” While over 40% of Americans say they go to church weekly, less than 20% are actually going. Are you among the non-committals? Are you just dating the church? If so, I encourage you to take the next step and have a “church” wedding.